Scavenger Hunt (1979)

Scavenger HuntStarring Richard Benjamin, James Coco, Cloris Leachman, Cleavon Little, Roddy McDowall, Richard Mulligan, Scatman Crothers, Tony Randall, Dirk Benedict, Willie Aames, Stephanie Faracy, Richard Masur, Maureen Teefy, Robert Morley, Hal Landon Jr., Vincent Price, Meat Loaf, Avery Schreiber, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Ruth Gordon

Directed by Michael Schultz

Expectations: Low.

twohalfstar


Hey you vultures! You want a review of Scavenger Hunt? Well, alright then! I’ll give you one! You’ve got till 5 PM Pacific Time to collect all kinds of crazy stuff and bring it back here, and whoever has the most points wins!

Here’s what you’re looking for:

Toilet Stuffed Fish Fake Teeth Kayak Teddy Bear
Hockey Stick Jack in the Box Head Safe Suit of Armor Police Uniform
Nitrous Oxide Cash Register Ostrich Basketball Hoop Bulletproof Vest
Medicine Ball Wedding Dress Innertube Pedal Car Foxtail
Cowbell Piñata Brass Instrument Rolls Royce Grill Microscope
Safety Cone Totem Pole Moose Head Baby Carriage The Fattest Person You Can Find

……….AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNND GO! Good luck!

Update: 5 PM has come and gone! It’s all over, folks! Hit the break for the review… you’ve earned it!

Continue reading Scavenger Hunt (1979) →

Stay Hungry (1976)

Stay HungryStarring Jeff Bridges, Sally Field, Arnold Schwarzenegger, R.G. Armstrong, Robert Englund, Helena Kallianiotes, Roger E. Mosley, Woodrow Parfrey, Scatman Crothers, Kathleen Miller, Fannie Flagg

Directed by Bob Rafelson

Expectations: Low. I just expect to see some good, young Arnold.

twohalfstar


Geez, what a weird movie. Its tone is pretty heavily in the drama department, but at times it ventures so far into absurd comedy that it’s hard not to shake your head and cautiously laugh. What’s even odder is that the film’s best and most successful bit of comedy comes right amidst the most fucked up dramatic situation, so laughing at it just seems wrong and out of place. It’s genuinely funny (strangely enough in something of a Hercules in New York kinda way), but due to the tone of everything surrounding it, it’s hard to understand what the filmmakers were going for.

Stay Hungry is about Craig Blake (Jeff Bridges), a rich kid who’s had everything given to him his whole life. His parents have just died and now he’s in charge of their estate. For some reason, he’s working for a real estate agency that is buying up properties for some shady reason I didn’t specifically pick up on. They need Blake to convince the owner of the Olympic Spa to sell his place to them, but because he’s got no ambition to do anything, he doesn’t much care about buying the place. Instead, he decides to befriend the people there, specifically Joe Santo (Arnold Schwarzenegger) and Mary Tate (Sally Field), and see where that leads. He’s just so carefree, man.

Continue reading Stay Hungry (1976) →

Uncle Jasper reviews: Friday Foster (1975)

Allow me to introduce my buddy, Uncle Jasper. He’s gonna chime in from time to time with a review, so give him a big welcome. First up, Friday Foster with Pam Grier!


Starring Pam Grier, Yaphet Kotto, Carl Weathers, Scatman Crothers, Eartha Kitt and Godfrey Cambridge

Directed By Arthur Marks


I admit it, by the end of this movie I had no fucking clue what was going on… Some convoluted plot about a bunch of white dudes in afro wigs conspiring to take out all of the nation’s black leaders. But my God, if the merit of a film lies in its ability to entertain, then this is a masterpiece in the same league as Dolemite and Fantasy Mission Force.

Look, all you need to know is that Pam Grier has never looked better and Yaphet Kotto has never been more charming. I swear to God, every time he flashed that goofy-ass gap-toothed grin of his I kept thinking how much he resembled a black Ernest Borgnine. He and Pam make an awesome duo and I would have loved to see them share the screen more often. Scatman Crothers is somewhere in there as a pervy priest, and the black dude from The Love Boat is great as the neighborhood pimp (“You have to admit… my shit is HEAVY!!” he tells Pam). Somewhere in the middle you have Eartha Kitt as an over the top fashion designer and Carl Weathers backing a delivery truck into some effeminate dude in a phone booth, crushing him to death. Whew! What a cast they rounded up for this one! It plays like the Grand Hotel of 1970s black cinema.

This film would be one of Pam’s last for American International. It is nowhere near as raw as Coffy and lacks the urgency of Foxy Brown, but it would be silly to even compare them. The point of this movie isn’t to provoke outrage, it’s a party movie that just wants us all to look good and have fun. I’m not saying that Friday Foster is the superior film, but Pam does have a little more breathing room here and it’s nice to see her in the arms of a suave millionaire for a change instead of being hog-tied and raped by some drunken hillbilly.

This movie has enough car chases, rooftop fights, machine guns and titties to overcome any shortcoming it may have in terms of plot. In fact, this film stares plot straight in the face and laughs at it. Anybody willing enough to not take it too seriously will be greatly rewarded.

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