If you’re a regular visitor to this site, I’m sure you noticed that June was rather light on content. As I mentioned a few months back, I’m afraid this sort of thing is going to become more of the norm than the… abnorm. I’ve always kind of danced around the why of it all, but I think it’ll all make more sense if I just come out with it. My day job is as a caregiver for my girlfriend of 10 years who is afflicted with debilitating multiple sclerosis. As you might imagine, this takes up a fair amount of time and energy.
While I often get an hour-long block here or there to play a video game or watch something, recently I am rarely finding the solid 2–3 hour chunks required to watch a movie, plus another hour or so to write about it afterwards. When time was an issue before, I sometimes used to resort to watching a movie in chunks to keep the site going, but as of last month or so, I decided that I should no longer do this for films I’m trying to review. Not only is it not fair to the film, it makes it a much more stressful situation for me as a reviewer. After I’ve watched the first hour of a movie, there is a time crunch to watch the second half before I forget everything and have to start the damn thing over again (which has happened numerous times). My stress levels were much too high about something as fun and “relaxing” as watching movies, so this is why I decided to not do that anymore.
This decision has subsequently led me to watching more things I don’t have to review (such as TV shows), and I have also started down the road of becoming an anime fan. A part of me wants to write about these shows I’m watching and thoroughly enjoying, but I have yet to feel compelled enough to actually put fingers to the keyboard. And besides, if I start making this fun and relaxing thing into a writing task to create site content, then I’m just right back where I started. I have enough stress as it is, and I have way too many gray hairs than I think a normal 32-year-old dude should have. So fuck it.
Once again, I hope you visitors and readers can bear with me as I slowly trickle reviews out at a snail’s pace. I sincerely apologize to anyone following my ongoing review series (especially the lengthy and nearly insurmountable Shaw Bros. series), as they have all stalled and I have no clue when I’ll get back to them. I find that when I’m not watching a bunch of movies every week my inclination is to reach for something other than one of the series films, even if they’re as enjoyable as Arnold or Shaw films. I remain committed to finishing all of my series, though, so they will continue. Hopefully soon, but no guarantees. And when I say continue, it’s probably more realistic to say that they will appear randomly in fits and starts.
Feel free to leave polite (or nasty) words of encouragement in the comments, but also please vote in this poll below to let me know how you really feel. Thanks again and Happy 4th of July to my fellow dwellers of the US! 🙂
Well my dear friend, I am saddened to hear that you will have to slow down on something you treasure and have worked so hard to build. I do understand that your commitment and love for L@@@@ comes first. My prayers are with you both. I know this is and has been extremely hard. Gray hairs suck ass!!! Luckily for you, men look extremely dignified with them! I love you
PS-please do not forget to spend the little time you have refueling yourself. It is important to find max joy in minimum time my friend! I will see you next month. We’re sooooo excited!!!!
Ah, thanks so much! I do love what I do here, so I’m definitely not stopping. But yeah, my responsibility and love will always come first.
My gray hairs aren’t honestly that bad, it’s just that lately they seem to be appearing at an alarming rate. One day my beard had one, and then the next day it was two, and now it’s a bunch. I don’t care about the gray hairs specifically, but more that they represent the effects of my general stress levels.
I’m so excited you’re coming, too!
Hang in there, buddy. I’m sure you’ve got your hands full, but I’m also sure you’ll handle it and keep your sanity in the process. Cutting back on what you’re so dedicated to is sad, but there’s no way anyone could blame you.
Good luck! I’m rooting for you!
Thanks, dude. I’m doing my best to hang onto that sanity. It helps a bit that I’ve shifted my obsessive nature towards TV shows/anime now, so at least I have something fun to think about instead of all the things I’m not doing. If I don’t distract myself sometimes it can get rough.
Dude, blogging should never come before real life. You have your priorities exactly in the right order! That said – more kitties on a laptop please, they’re sooooo cute!
It’s always tough finding that work/life/play balance when you have a responsibility such as the one you have with your girlfriend. My good mate had a similar experience with his mother (who also had MS) a few years back, having to pick up being one of her primary carers, so although it’s not a direct comparison I can certainly appreciate your situation. And I’ve found the best way to deal with those grey hairs is to shave them right back to nothing!
You sound committed in exactly the right way, which is all your GF could ever ask, and I have no doubt that even in the tough times she’s extremely grateful (not to mention lucky!) to have you. I have no doubt that putting the blogging aside for a while to concentrate on her is something not too many people here would argue against. And if they do, fuck them. We’re grateful for any of your fabulous writings, be it infrequent or not.
Best wishes, my friend. To you and your GF.
Hahahaha, I take every chance I get to add a kitty picture! There’s probably one on most of my non-review posts.
Thanks for your kind words. It’s definitely not easy to fall into the caregiver role, but we do the best we can with the situation. My sense of humor keeps us laughing, which always helps.
Glad you appreciate the reviews I write. I’m in this for the long haul, so they definitely aren’t stopping.
I am very sorry to hear about the health issues with your significant other. I hope both of you bounce back soon. I’ll be keeping you both in my thoughts.
Thanks, Bobby! It’s tough but we’re hangin’ in there.
Definitely understandable. Don’t stress about the site; write when you enjoy writing.
Thanks, Morgan! I love writing for the site, so it is hard to step back a bit. But the more I do, the more I see how being stressed about it is kinda crazy. It’s something I do for fun, so hopefully now it’ll be more of that.
Will you are a true hero! I had no idea that you were looking after your poor girlfriend like that. My very best wishes to you both. Take care!
Aww, thanks Meredith! You’re so kind. I feel like I need a fancy wuxia name now that I’ve been called a hero!