By  Will, on January 29, 2013, 5:20 am
Starring Natalie Sutherland, Danny Wolske, Laura Nativo, Brinke Stevens, Larry Dirk, Julie Strain, Ronnie Gene Blevins, Kyle Lupo, Skye Stafford, Jennifer L. Johnson, Karen A. Smith, Chuck Kapinskis
Directed by Devin Hamilton
Expectations: Moderately high. I loved the trailer for this.
On the general scale:
On the B-movie scale:
I usually don’t find it hard to write about movies these days, but once in a while a movie stumps me. I sit in front of the computer, desperately doing anything other than write. I do this in an attempt to make it seem like I could be writing, but I’m just choosing not to. The whole time I know exactly what I’m doing: putting off the inevitable stare at the white screen of Notepad as I think of how to start writing about yet another movie.
It’s not that I didn’t like Birth Rite. I actually really enjoyed it. But it’s just one of those movies that’s not going to be all that fun to write about. I mean, it doesn’t have any suburban witches and warlocks practicing the dark arts in their garage, nor does it have magical amulets or creepy betrothals between a grown man and a six-year-old girl. Oh wait! It has all of those! Birth Rite was fun as shit!
Continue reading Birth Rite (2003) →
By Will, on September 18, 2012, 5:20 am  Starring Elizabeth Kaitan, Cindy Beal, Don Scribner, Brinke Stevens, Carl Horner, Kirk Graves, Randolph Roehbling
Directed by Ken Dixon
Expectations: Moderate. I love The Most Dangerous Game, and I love cheap sci-fi, so where can this go wrong?
On the general scale:
On the B-movie scale:
Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity is a film with limited appeal. Basically, if you’ve ever watched a sci-fi film, but wished the protagonists were played by buxom beauties in loincloths, then your search is over. There’s also the niche group of audience members that may have secretly wished for the same buxom beauties in something of a Most Dangerous Game scenario. Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity fulfills both fantasies, but beyond that it doesn’t do much. And if that wasn’t your thing going into the movie, I doubt the movie has the power enough to sway your sexual fantasies into the weird and wild. But who knows, give it a shot!
So as I alluded to: Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity is a science fiction re-telling of Richard Connell’s The Most Dangerous Game. The slave girls of the title are Daria and Tisa, who escape from a prison ship in the opening minutes. They hijack the ship and set out for stars unknown, but instead they end up crash landing on a nearby planet inhabited by an eccentric hunter named Zed and his robot servants. He invites the girls to dinner, where they meet a couple of other shipwrecked people under the care of Zed. This would normally be a seminal scene of the story, where the hunter reveals some sadistic fascination with hunting, but instead it’s just kinda boring.
Continue reading Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity (1987) →
By Will, on May 22, 2012, 5:20 am  Starring Nicolas Read, Marcella Laasch, Sewell Whitney, Sarah Megan White, Jay Richardson, Stephen O’Mahoney, Trent Haaga, Lilith Stabs, Brinke Stevens
Directed by J.R. Bookwalter
Expectations: None. Films that don’t get released usually don’t get released for a reason.
On the general scale:
On the B-Movie scale:
I don’t have the full story, but from what I gather Deadly Stingers is an unreleased Syfy Channel production with some involvement from what then constituted the Full Moon company. For some reason, it was never shown or released in the US, but it did find a home on television in the UK. While I’d love to say that you’ve been done wrong once again by the man, and Deadly Stingers is a holy grail for killer scorpion aficionados, I’m unable– ah who am I kidding? If you’re a killer scorpion fiend (and you don’t mind that these killer scorpions are mutants grown to human size), then you need to watch Deadly Stingers. I’m not an expert, but I’m sure it’s pretty safe to say that this is a fairly untapped sub-genre.
Deadly Stingers is exactly the sparsely scripted, low-budget horror schlock you’d expect it to be, but it is made with enough style and fun that it overcomes all the odds stacked against it. This is a traditional small town horror film, where a group of people are separated and have to do their best to fend off the fearsome creatures assaulting the town. But when I say small town horror, don’t expect anything nearly as funny and entertaining as James Gunn’s Slither. This is on a completely different scale.
Continue reading Deadly Stingers (2003) →
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