By  Will, on December 8, 2012, 5:20 am  Alluda Mazaaka…! [అల్లుడా మజాకా] (1995)
AKA Alluda Majaka
Starring Chiranjeevi, Lakshmi, Ramya Krishna, Rambha, Ooha, Kota Srinivasa Rao, Giri Babu, Brahmanandam, Mallikarjuna Rao, Chinna, Srihari, Manthena Ramalingaraju, Allu Ramalingaiah
Directed by E.V.V. Satyanarayana
Expectations: High. Jasper sent me the opening action sequence on YouTube and it was one of the best things I’ve ever seen, ever.
On the general scale:
On the B-movie scale:
Holy shit, if there was ever a movie that one review could not contain, this is it. Alluda Mazaaka…! is nuts, packing in everything you could ever want in a movie as well as tons of shit you never knew you needed to see until now. Alluda Mazaaka…! is the gift that keeps on giving, opening with one of the most exciting and explosive action sequences I’ve ever seen and holding my attention consistently through its near three-hour runtime. Alluda Mazaaka…! is an insane movie, and I only hope I can do it some justice here.
The story is a twisting, hilarious affair of betrayal and double-crosses but at the heart of the tale are Seetharam and his sister. Seetharam is a man unjustly accused of murder, and is being sent to the gallows as the film opens. His last request is to visit the temple of his village. Mourning his loss in advance, the women weep, the men lament the situation with frustration and calls of “Why?”, babies cry and small children cling to his feet as he enters the bus that will take him to his ultimate fate. Seetharam is a dude that inspires much love. But as they’re driving into the town to hang him, Seetharam spots a wedding taking place and absolutely loses his shit, unleashing one of the greatest and most destructive action sequences of all time.
Continue reading Alluda Mazaaka…! (1995) →
By  Stephen, on November 28, 2012, 5:20 am  Starring Gary Daniels, Malcolm McDowell, Costas Mandylor, Downtown Julie Brown, Dante Basco, Nalona Herron, Melvin Van Peebles, Clint Howard, Chris Penn, Andre Rosey Brown, Isako Washio, Paulo Tocha
Directed by Tony Randel
Now what on Earth am I doing reviewing a live-action American film, you might ask. Well, if your memory reaches back a few weeks, you might remember my review of the anime Fist of the North Star, and this is the live-action adaptation of the series, though not specifically of that 1986 film. It claims to be the first Hollywood adaptation of an anime, and in the absence of any contrary evidence, I’m not going to argue.
The use of the word “Hollywood” implies an impressive big-budget production, but that really isn’t the case. Kill Bill this ain’t. You’re also probably questioning if a live-action American film could possibly capture the spirit of an anime, especially one as absurd as Fist of the North Star. Obviously you can’t expect to see a 20-foot-tall giant turn his skin into steel and trample an entire army. And since shit like that is the main draw of the anime title, you have to go into this version with some vastly different expectations.
Continue reading Stephen reviews: Fist of the North Star (1995) →
By Will, on October 4, 2012, 5:20 am  Starring Clarence Williams III, Joe Torry, De’aundre Bonds, Samuel Monroe, Jr., Tom Wright, Anthony Griffith, Wings Hauser, Michael Massee, Duane Whitaker, Brandon Hammond, Rusty Cundieff, Paula Jai Parker, David Alan Grier, Corbin Bernsen, Roger Guenveur Smith, Lamont Bentley, Rosalind Cash
Directed by Rusty Cundieff
Expectations: Low, I’m not an anthology fan. I do love the poster, though.
On the general scale:
On the B-movie scale:
I’ve never been one for horror anthology films, but my love of Tales from the Crypt, and my ideas that this would be a fun, black version of that, won me over and led to me giving this one a shot. Well… it ain’t pretty. There’s not a whole lot that’s good here, but thankfully, what’s good is excellent. But those excellent bits I’m referring to are the FX, which realistically are about 1% of the actual runtime. Everything else is just painful, or boring, or both.
The film opens with a title sequence that involves the camera slowly moving around a skeleton decked out in locs, a bandana and smoking a fat blunt. While I found this funny, and therefore kind of expected something of a horror comedy from the film, I was sorely disappointed when the first tale began with extreme, racially charged violence from a group of asshole white cops. It’s not really offensive as it takes stereotypes and plays them up for the purpose of crashing them down with giant horror payoffs, but it was still jarring. I’m willing to buy into the movie for those payoffs, but no matter how hard I tried I was unable to get involved completely in any of the stories except the final, Clockwork Orange-inspired one (which coincidentally ends with the worst payoff of the entire film).
Continue reading Tales from the Hood (1995) →
By Stephen, on August 29, 2012, 5:20 am  Legend of Crystania [はじまりの冒険者たち レジェンド・オブ・クリスタニア, Hajimari no Bōkenshatachi: Rejendo obu Kurisutania] (1995)
AKA First Adventurers: Legend of Crystania
Starring Hikaru Midorikawa, Mitsuki Yayoi, Kiyoshi Kobayashi, Sakiko Tamagawa, Chinami Nishimura, Kazuki Yao, Toshihiko Seki, Fumihiko Tachiki
Directed by Ryutaro Nakamura
This film supposedly ties into an anime series called Record of Lodoss War. I saw that series once upon a time, but I honestly don’t remember much about it. I even had trouble remembering its name just now. It developed a cult following for some reason, but I never really saw why. I enjoyed it at the time, but it never struck me as particularly great, or even unique. Legend of Crystania has left much the same impression on me, and like Lodoss War, I will probably forget most of it in a month or so.
It’s actually rather hard to come up with anything to say about Crystania, because there really isn’t anything good or bad about this film. It’s positively average. It’s a typical revenge story where the main character discovers that vengeance won’t make his life better, just like every other revenge story out there. It’s also a typical fantasy adventure across a magical landscape that really isn’t all that amazing because we’ve seen it all before. And it’s the typical coming of age tale of a young nobody getting sucked into a grand adventure and becoming a stronger and more reliable somebody.
Continue reading Stephen reviews: Legend of Crystania (1995) →
By Will, on August 5, 2012, 12:01 am  Starring Val Kilmer, Tommy Lee Jones, Jim Carrey, Nicole Kidman, Chris O’Donnell, Michael Gough, Pat Hingle, Drew Barrymore, Debi Mazar, Elizabeth Sanders, Rene Auberjonois
Directed by Joel Schumacher
Expectations: High, but guarded. I was all about this shit in the 90s, but times have changed.
If I went into re-watching Tim Burton’s 1989 version of Batman with trepidation, then I pushed play on Batman Forever with abject terror. I was thoroughly obsessed with this film from the moment I saw it in the theater until a few years later. I bought the VHS the day it came out and watched it whenever I could get the chance. It had dropped during my (and the world’s) love affair with Jim Carrey, so how could I not love it? Anyway, that kind of love doesn’t generally translate well to adulthood, but I’m here to tell you that Batman Forever holds up admirably, for me anyway. It appealed to the wild sense of fun that I love to see films embrace, and while it definitely treads in over-the-top territory, it’s a sugary sweet, neon-tinged version of over-the-top that goes down just right.
After the debacle that was the story of Batman Returns, the general framework of Batman returns and provides us with something of a tried and true formula, but turned up a notch at every available opportunity. Now instead of the hot blonde seducing Bruce Wayne, she’s falling for both Wayne and Batman, creating something of a love triangle that mindfucks Bruce into rethinking his life. Two-Face is creating a menace in Gotham (no word on if he was also drinking his juice in the hood), and Edward Nygma quickly turns insane and starts dropping riddles after a failed conversation with his idol Bruce Wayne. The game is afoot, and all that…
Continue reading Batman Forever (1995) →
By Will, on August 4, 2012, 5:20 am  Scanner Cop II: The Showdown (1995)
AKA Scanner Cop II: Volkin’s Revenge, Scanners IV: Scanner Cop, Scanners: The Showdown
Starring Daniel Quinn, Patrick Kilpatrick, Khrystyne Haje, Stephen Mendel, Robert Forster, Brenda Swanson, Jerry Potter, Jewel Shepard, Tony Fasce
Directed by Steve Barnett
Expectations: Hmm, kinda high. Scanner Cop was dope.
On the general scale:
On the B-Movie scale:
Following up the incredibly entertaining Scanner Cop is a hard task for any filmmaker, but the team behind Scanner Cop II did their best and came away with a pretty fun movie. It’s not nearly as intriguing or well-written, but it makes up for those faults with sheer numbers, as there has to be more scanning going on in this movie than in all four previous Scanners films combined. Every time someone is scanning, they play haunting choral music that seeps into your pores and unsettles your very being… and it’s playing almost constantly during Scanner Cop II because they hardly ever take a break from scanning! They’re scanning people, they’re scanning scanners, they even scan a bomb at one point; simply put, there’s a whole lotta scannin’ goin’ on.
Scanner Cop II is seriously lacking in the plot department, though, with our hero the Scanner Cop (the only character to appear in two Scanners films!) hot on the trail of a scanner recently escaped from a mental institution. This scanner is unique in that he uses his scanning abilities to drain power from less capable scanners, assimilating their strength into his being and becoming that much stronger. Every one of these assimilations is accompanied by an intense scan-a-thon that will have you on the edge of your seat as our villain (played brilliantly by Patrick Kilpatrick) makes tortured scanning faces while his victim is literally sucked dry of their life force. His victims go from living, breathing humans to blackened husks right before our eyes. Scanner Cop II might be a low-budget sequel, but like its predecessor, it pumps much of its budget directly into the FX. This is always to be applauded, and Scanner Cop II is a great find for a physical FX hound like myself.
Continue reading Scanner Cop II: The Showdown (1995) →
By Stephen, on May 2, 2012, 5:20 am  Slayers [スレイヤーズ, Sureiyâzu]
Starring Megumi Hayashibara, Maria Kawamura, Osamu Saka, Tessho Genda, Minami Takayama
Directed by Hiroshi Watanabe & Kazuo Yamazaki
As you might have guessed by the title, Slayers: the Motion Picture is by no means the first product in the Slayers franchise. But unlike other anime movies, this is not a summary of a longer series or a sequel relying on previous events. It has no influence on the rest of the series, nor does the rest of the series influence it in any meaningful way, and its place in the timeline is mostly indeterminate. (Various websites assure me it’s a prequel, but there is nothing in the film to indicate that.) Therefore, it makes as good an entry point as any to the series.
Rather than the usual gang of misfits the series centers around, main character and master wizard Lina Inverse is wandering around on her own and is soon dragged off by fellow sorceress Naga to visit the famous hot springs of Mipross Island. I’m glad they kept the cast small, as the movie avoids the pitfalls of huge casts that plague many other anime films. Instead it is a classic odd couple routine where the two conflicting personalities of Lina and Naga collide.
Continue reading Stephen reviews: Slayers: the Motion Picture (1995) →
|
|
Recent Comments